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Surfing in Kuta Indonesia: A Perfect Place for  beginners and Kids

Our 4-year old finding his sea legs at the Hard Rock Surf school in Bali.

Surfing Kuta for Kids

During our time here in Bali, we had the opportunity to see and/or surf a large majority of Bali’s famous surf breaks.

Kuta is the place we chose for our 4-year-old son and 6-year-old daughter to take surf lessons. I joined them as well for a family day of fun, sun and longboard adventures.

I joined them as well for a family day of fun, sun and longboard adventures.

surfing with kids in Bali

Our 4-year old riding his first wave

Kuta beach is perfect for kids because it has white sand and white water, which creates a very safe beginners break on which to learn.

Depending on the tide, the outside swell can be hectic, with strong riptides and decent sized swell which is not beginner friendly, yet offers a fun and challenging wave for the advanced beginner and intermediate all the way up to the experienced surfer.

Surf shops and Lessons in Kuta

It is easy to rent surfboards on the beach but for the same price you can rent very nice soft top boards from the surf shop in front of the Hard Rock Hotel.

We rented boards and signed up for lessons here. They take small children as young as 4 all the way up to 38 🙂

Starting on the beach poolside (yes there is actually a manmade artificial beach at the hotel pool) at the Hard Rock the kids learn to paddle, balance and stand.  Once they had the basics covered they head to the beach break with their instructors.

The intermediate adult lessons were horrible, so for this I would go elsewhere, but for the kids I thought this was an excellent experience.

The Hard Rock also offers free lockers to store your valuables while you hit the breakers, which is a big advantage over renting your board on the beach. 

The Hard Rock Hotel surf shop is open until 6 pm.

Renting our boards with the kids at the Hard Rock Hotel In Kuta

Renting our boards with the kids at the Hard Rock Hotel In Kuta

KID AND FAMILY FRIENDLY SURF SPOTS

While I am at it, I will mention a couple other kid friendly surf spots that you should consider if you are visiting Bali.

Jimbaran Beach

I found the beginners break at Jimbaran beach on my second day when the tide was just right and you could spot the break all the way from the end of the beach.

The break is perfect for long-boards and beginners. It is a long right hand, very light and steady wave.

If you are standing on the airport end of the beach just walk about 1.2 miles and you can’t miss it. You can rent boards on the beach and they offer lessons.

You can read my post on where we stayed in Jimbaran here.

Medewei

We stopped only briefly to see this famed super-long left-hand surf break on our way up the coast from Balian beach.

It looks like a great wave for beginners.  Appears somewhat shallow in low tide and breaks over rock, but the inside wave is gentle and appears very safe.

If you are a beginner looking for surf in Bali this would make a great stop!

Balian Beach

The Aussies told me Balian was for beginners, but I would say it is an intermediate surf spot. The rips are strong and the current can be difficult to manage. The wave, when it is really breaking, makes for a rather steep curling face that packs some serious punch.

There were beginners out there the 3 days I surfed it, but unless it is a smaller day, I would opt for the pool instead.

Regardless, the accommodations in Balian are top notch, and this is a beautiful beach with great surf, a nice pool, and spectacular sunsets. That should be reason enough to stop here.

You can read my post on where we stayed in Balian beach here.

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Kids Travel Blog – Love Cookie

I love my cat and her name is Cookie.

I am sad that Cookie has to go away.  So I have to say can you take care of Cookie?

Lucca likes cookie because she plays with us and  she is cud-lie and I like Cookie because she is a sweet cat and  my mom loves Cookie because she will let Mom pet her.  and she is a good alarm clock Cookie is a good cat.  she will sleep with the kids.

She  does not hiss. Cookie is a loving Cat.  that will love You.

Cookie wants you to take her home.

Now you can take Cookie home.

 

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A Mother’s Intervention to End Her Daughter’s Trip Around the World

The Beginning

It all started Saturday with a vague and eerie message requesting a phone call back.

She wanted uninterrupted quiet time for at least 1 hour.  She even suggested getting a cup of coffee and making sure I was out of the house.

This would need to be a time where I couldn’t use the kids screaming in the background or bad cell phone service as an excuse.

Wow, this was getting serious!

The “Intervention”

My first thought was “Intervention”.

My second thought was I’m 36 and why do I have to justify or explain myself?  Did I mention I’m 36?

She raised a successful daughter in career and relationships and now, now she wants to have a serious talk?  Are you kidding me?  It’s my life and I’ve made good decisions all my life.

I’m still married, have wonderful kids, a home, a career, no tattoos, no weird piercings.  Now my mom thinks we’ve gone off the deep end; acting irresponsibly just because we want to travel for a year with two small kids and quit our jobs.

It’s a good thing she left a message or else in my confused, offended initial reaction I wouldn’t have had kind words.

But, as the day went on thinking about it, I thought differently.

Once a Mom, Always a Mom

I have a Mom and Dad that love me and my family so much that they are seeking the answers to their questions and insecurities.

They don’t want to act selfish so they instead ask the hard questions running through their minds.  I can embrace that the thought of traveling with two small kids and leaving our comfortable world behind us might look crazy to some and look as if we’re “running away” from something.

So I called her back and set up a phone date. (Mom lives in Washington, me in California).

We talked.  I put the conversation in her hands.   I put up rules though.

“I love and respect you, but this is our life, I’m an adult and I’m doing this under my own free will.”

I said this up front because I think the driving force of my Moms insecurities came from me sharing my insecurities over Christmas and she couldn’t grasp how I’d done a 360 on my thoughts.

She asked all the obvious questions my husband and I’ve been working through for the last 3 months:

    • Why?
    • What about the kids’ education?
    • What will you do for money?
    • What will you do for health insurance?
    • What will you do with the house, car, and cat?
    • Where are you going?
    • When are you coming back?
    • What does my daughter’s teacher think? (Super excited by the way.)

And then, with a mothers love, she voiced her narrow minded questions/concerns that stop so many people from traveling:

    • It’s dangerous over there!
    • How will this affect the kids with friends/school when they come back?
    • How are they going to have a since of security?
    • Your husband has done some dumb dangerous things and we’re worried you’ll put your kids in harms way.  (Oh I got a little heated on that one).
    • What if Stephen doesn’t want a 9-5 job when he comes back?
    • My favorite one, “Don’t not come back if you need to just to spite us and prove us all wrong.”

I felt about 16 again.  Really Mom?  Come on.  I’m an adult now. The last thing I’ll be thinking at this point in time is, “what will people think?”

Working out The Details

By the end of the conversation I could tell all her questions weren’t answered. We’re still working on them too.

I made a point to let her know that I respect and love her enough to share my thoughts and feelings, but by no means  was she going to change our minds.  If she wanted to keep the lines of communication open she would have to come to a level of acceptance and start being a positive, supportive force from this point on.

If she could not achieve this; she’d have to commiserate and bounce her negative, worried feelings with someone else. It’s a good thing she has a good relationship with my mother-in-law.  I’m sure they will be talking a lot in the next year.

It is my moms fault I want to do this anyway, she and dad raised a strong woman.  One who is capable of dreaming big dreams and having the tools to pursue them.

Loving Parents

I have great, loving parents who will always be a part of my life and I do value their opinions.

I’ll always need my Mom and Dad even when their gone.  I too some day will question my kids’ decisions in life and hope I can see the value in trusting I’ve raised them well enough to succeed.

I hope they have a sense of adventure, but the best we can hope for our children is for them to be happy.

It’s hard to watch them fall or fail. As parents we have to trust that they learn from their mistakes and are able to brush it off and be stronger for it.  I’d hate to see my kids afraid to fail.  It’s with failures and pushing the limits, we truly can achieve great success.

Mom, I’m truly Happy!  But most of all, Excited!

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Since this conversation I’ve sent my mom and our family multiple links we’ve been using to research and inspire us.  I hope this will ease her anxieties.  My mom’s opinions and concerns have been echoed from many family members.  I get it.  They love us, worry about us and most of all: will miss us. Surprisingly friends and strangers are only excited and interested.  Many have voiced their desire to do the same thing.

[/templatic_msg_box]
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Notes From Creative Live – Stress Free BUDGET TRAVEL with Matt Kepnes from Nomadic Matt

How to Travel The World on a Shoestring Budget

Dwonload

DAY 1

I. Travel Anywhere on a Budget

  1. media make travel look expensive—this is not true
  2. luxury sells
  3. it is possible to travel cheaply
  4. travel like you live at home, travel like a local
  5. everyone is afraid

II. Three Steps

  1. Decide where you want to go. Have an actionable goal.
  2. Decide how long you want to go for.
  3. Start researching.
    1. Google “what to do in X”
    2. travel blogs
    3. Lonely Planet, TripAdvisor, Wikivoyage
  4. Make travel a priority. Work towards your goals. Don’t overthink it.
  5. Book your flight. Then you’re stuck.

III. Financing

  1.  Track your expenses.
  2. Categorize in to “wants” and “needs.”
  3. Cut your “wants.”
  4. Think of things as opportunity costs: the loss of potential gain from other alternatives when one alternative is chosen.
    1. Retina MacBook Pro vs. plane ticket
    2. new camera vs. the pictures you could take with the one you own
  5. Cut the coffee. Cancel cable. Find a roommate. Sell your car.
  6. Build a network on Couchsurfing to save money in the future.
  7. Don’t give your savings to banks!
    1. Global ATM Alliance
    2. Charles Schwab (#1 bank you should go to)
    3. Capital One
    4. Fidelity
    5. HSBC (secondary bank)
    6. BankAmerica (worst case scenario)
  8. If you’re living long-term somewhere, get a local bank card.
  9. Avoid overseas fees on credit cards.
    1.  Capital One No Hassles Rewards Card (best one)
    2. Chase Sapphire
    3. United Mileage
    4. Chase Ink (business)
    5. American Express Platinum
    6. stick with Mastercard or Visa
    7. always have a backup bank card and credit card
  10. Four ways to save money.
    1. Don’t let them charge your purchases in local currency.
    2. If they ask you, always choose US Dollars.
    3. Never exchange money at airports.
    4. Never use traveler’s checks.
    5. Avoid random ATMs. Use bank ATMs.
  11.  Keep cash on hand for emergencies only. Look for exchanges in ethnic communities.
  12. Use Currency (app) or xe.com for exchange rates.
  13. Get Free Rewards with Travel Rewards Cards
    1.  Matt has 27 credit cards!
    2. b. Ways to fake spending for high spending requirements.
      1. Pay your taxes.
      2. Amazon spending: give $1000 a month without a fee. Then have your friend give it back to you.
    3. Sign up for cards with a spending requirement of $1000 or less.
    4. Use PayPal or Amazon Payments to pay rent.
  14. Notes of Caution
    1. Don’t spend money just for the points.
    2. Start out slow.
    3. Don’t go overboard if you are about to make a big purchase.
    4. Have a specific goal.
  15. How to collect extra points.
    1. Shop with partners: all points programs have online shopping partners.
      1. Evreward.com
    2. Have your family give their points to you.
    3. Sign up for airline and credit card newsletters. Follow them on Twitter and Facebook for special deals.
  16. Make sure to get a no-fee bank card and a no-fee travel credit card.
  17. Use awardwallet.com to manage points.
  18. In some developing countries, using cash is better to avoid fees.
  19. No fees, no fees, no fees!!!!!!

IV. Safety

[templatic_button link=”https://www.gapyearfamily.com/safety” size=”large” type=”info”] Keeping Safe with Kids [/templatic_button]

Use Common Sense

  1. Don’t be flashy. Don’t make yourself a target.
  2. Be healthily suspicious.
  3. Avoid walking drunk (especially at night).
  4. Watch out for scams. You can look them up online first to be prepared.
  5. Watch out for con artists.
  6. Ask locals for advice.
  7. Ask other travelers for advice.

Protecting Your Stuff

  1. Lock up your stuff.
  2. Keep a piece of paper with three false PIN codes.
  3. Keep a few notes of the lowest currency in your pocket. If you get mugged, bunch up the notes and offer it to the mugger. It’ll look like more money than it is, and it may save your life.

IV. Solo Female Traveling with Candace

  1. Most people are nice and willing to help.
  2. Staring, hissing, cat-calling can all be problems.
  3. One idea: wear a fake wedding ring and say that you’re married.
  4. Dress conservatively.
  5. Know local cultural customs.
  6. Book hostels that are in busy city centers, not quiet rural areas.
  7. WikiTravel has tips for how to dress and stay safe.
  8. Bangkok has good cheap salons, massages, manicures, etc.
  9. A self-defense class is a good idea.
  10. A can of aerosol spray (insect repellant, hairspray) is a good red pepper spray alternative.
  11. Her one piece of advice is intuition. Trust your gut.
  12. She trekked in Turkey and felt very welcome.

V. How to Make Friends Overseas

  1. Couchsurfing, Couchsurfing, Couchsurfing!!!
    1.  go to groups, meetups, and events
  2. Stay in hostels.
    1. go to events, tours, etc.
    2. talk to the people in your room
  3. Use Meetup.com to find locals with similar interests.
  4. Dine with locals: the Ghetto Gourmet and EatWith are good resources.
  5. Say hello to strangers. Just take the leap.

VI. Dealing with Unsupportive Friends and Family

  1.  Don’t let other people’s fears discourage you.
  2. Tell them: everywhere is unsafe, you can do this, lots of people travel solo, this makes you happy.
  3. Stay connected online.
  4. You can’t wait for your friends. JUST GO.

VIII. 5 Truths

  1. You aren’t the first person to travel alone.
  2. You made it this far.
  3. You are just as capable.
  4. You will make friends.
  5. You can always go home.

IX. Essential Gear & Technology

[templatic_button link=”https://www.gapyearfamily.com/gear/” size=”large” type=”info”] Family Friendly Travel Gear [/templatic_button]

  1. Packing cubes are a good idea.
  2. Keep all your valuables (camera, computer, etc.) in daypack.
  3. PacSafe is a metal mesh wrap for your backpack.
  4. Take a lock to lock your daypack and extra tech gear in a locker.
  5. Buy a subscription to Crashplan to back stuff up. Or look into Dropbox.
  6. Protect yourself while you’re web browsing: use a VPN.
    1. HotSpot Shield
    2. Witopia?
    3. Makes it look like you’re surfing from home, so you can use Netflix or other services that are country-specific.
  7. Phones
    1. Get an unlocked phone.
    2. Or buy and toss local phones as you go.
  8. You don’t need a lot of gear, you just need the right gear.

X. Choosing the right travel insurance.

    1. Buy it. Not an option.
    2. Look for coverage for: trip cancellation, hotel bookings, flights, all transportation, emergencies, strife in countries visited, legal expenses, financial protection, medical, etc.
    3. Take pictures of the stuff you own.
    4. Keep receipts for everything.
    5. World Nomads (Matt uses them)
    6. Insure My Trip
    7. MedJet Assist (good for covering gear)
    8. Clements

XI. Other Tips

  1. Take multiple copies of your passport.
  2. Go paperless with your billing.
  3.  Earth Class Mail will scan your mail.
  4. Make sure you have the right vaccinations.
  5. Call your credit card companies.
  6.  Give your parents all of your bank information.
  7. Don’t over think everything. Don’t over plan. Go with the flow.

EXTRAS:

  • Contact about Philippines: asfersarm@gmail.com
  • Get a Nexus 5 with local SIM and use it for data.
  • Or maybe carry the iPhone and get a cheap local phone.
  • Someone suggested myfico.com for credit scores.
  • Maybe sign up for Coin to manage your cards.
  • Merrell barefoot shoes are good for traveling.
  • Check out www.TravelTheRoad.com for tips on photo gear and packing.

DAY 2

I. How to Book a Cheap Ticket

[templatic_button link=”https://www.gapyearfamily.com/fly/” size=”large” type=”info”] Around The World Travel with Kids [/templatic_button]
  1. Be flexible with dates.
  2. Fly to secondary airports.
  3. Fly budget carriers – Here are some examples:
    1. Norwegian – flight to Scandinavia for $400
    2. RyanAir – Hubs now at London Stansted and Luton, Edinburgh, Liverpool, Nottingham, Glasgow Prestwick, Dublin, Shannon, Brussels, Frankfurt Hahn, Stockholm, Bergamo (nr. Milan), Rome and Girona (nr. Barcelona)
    3. AirAsia –  Internal and regional flights from hubs in Kuala Lumpur, Johor Bahru, Bangkok and Jakarta
    4. EasyJet – Hubs now at Gatwick, Luton, Stansted, Liverpool, Newcastle, Bristol, Belfast, Berlin Schönefeld, Dortmund, Geneva, Paris Orly
    5. German Wings – To UK and rest of Europe from German
    6. SAS
    7.  Tiger Airways – Low cost flights from Singapore Changi Airport to Southeast Asia 
  4. Try alternative routes – Go to a different city and then get a cheaper flight to your destination. Use connecting flights.
  5. Join airline mailing lists or set up ALERTS!
  6. Search on airline sites.
  7. All search engines are not equal.
    1. Skyscanner #4
    2. Momondo (good for international flights) #3
    3. Google Flights #2
    4. ITA Matrix
    5. Kayak
    6. Vayama (good for international flights out of the U.S.) #1
  8. Look at round trips and one-way flights regardless of what you want.
  9.  Sometimes, prices will go up if an airline notices your search (they do this using cookies). So book on a different computer or using a VPN.
    • Use incognito or private browsing modes.
  10. RTW tickets
    • Often not the best deal for families; use budget carriers instead
    • Can be a good deal if you know where you’re going and have lots of airline points
  11. Look into onward travel requirements for every country you visit: Onword Travel Hack

II. How to Book Cheap Accomodation

[templatic_button link=”https://www.gapyearfamily.com/sleep” size=”large” type=”info”] Booking Accommodations with Kids [/templatic_button]

Couch Surfing – www.couchsurfing.org

Find hosts to stay with in over 100,000 cities and connect with travelers from all over the world.

Couchsurfing pros: free, live like a local, interact with locals, kitchen access, take more than one traveler.
Couchsurfing cons: privacy, boring host, must trust people, not luxurious, be prepared for anything.

FREE Hospitality Networks:

  1. Be Welcome: Step inside and invite travelers to your home, find hosts all over the world, and become part of our multicultural hospitality community. We are not-for-profit, open source, and exclusively run by members in a transparent and democratic way.
  2. GlobalFreeloaders.com: is an online community, bringing people together to offer you free accommodation all over the world. Save money and make new friends whilst seeing the world from a local’s perspective!
  3. Servas: it’s a different way to explore the world 14,000 Servas members in over 130 countries will welcome you into their homes Servas is an international travel network whose members want to promote peace and understanding through contact with people from other countries

Home Exchanges are a Good Option – If you own a home!

House Sitting

  1. trustedhousesitters: TrustedHousesitters.com provides a simple solution to a very common problem: They connect home and pet owners who need a sitter with trustworthy people who want to housesit; reliable pet lovers and experienced home minders who are willing to live in your home and look after it while you’re away (usually for free).
  2. mindmyhouse:  Home owners join for free. House sitter memberships are the cheapest on the web at only US$20 or equivalent per year. Dual memberships are perfectly respectable.
  3. Housecarers: Get help you with tips and guides on how to Land the housesit, and give yourself the best exposure to our high traffic dedicated House Sitting Site. They have been Securely Matching House Sitters since October 2000.

Apartment Rentals

  1. Airbnb
  2. Home Away
  3. VRBO

Farm Stays

  1. WWOOF: Italy, France, NZ
  2. Helpx.net
  3. workaway.info

Monastery or Convent Stays

  1. Google monasterystay

Lighthouse Stays

Hostels, Hostels, Hostels

  1. Hostelworld.com
  2. Hostelbookers.com
  3. Hostels.com

III. Saving Money at Any Destination

 1. Travel like a local

 2. Saving Money on Food

  • Don’t eat out for every meal.
  • BUT, food is an important part of travel and experiencing other cultures. Don’t avoid eating out altogether. Just do it smartly.
  • Shop at local markets.
  • Eat out during lunch, rather than dinner to save money.
  • Outdoor vendors
  • Street food
  • Skip tourist areas. Never eat at a place in a guidebook.
  • Explore side streets.
  • Ask a local, “where do you eat?”
  • Ask around at the hostel.
  • Carry a reusable water bottle.
  • Eat at the buffet.

3. Food Safety Tips

  • Use a Steripen to purify water.
  • Look for places where women, children, and old people eat.
  • Bring your own silverware.
  • Be smart about what you’re eating and where.
  • Use hand sanitizer.
  • Go when it’s busy.
  • Stay away from street produce in areas with bad water.

4. Saving Money on Local Transport

  • Take local buses, ferries, etc.
  • Never take a taxi.
  • Buy metro cards. Ask at the station or hostel for the best deal.
  • Car Sharing Services: Zipcar, Jayride, Gumtree, Getaround
  • Rent a bike. Check out Zilok.com and Sharegoods.com.

5. Saving Money on Inter-Destination Transport

  • Get train passes, especially if you’re going to Europe, USA, Canada, New Zealand, Japan, Australia (best deal).
  • If you look for specials online and book early, it may be cheaper.
  • Book on buses 3 months in advance.
  • Megabus, Naked Bus (NZ), Boltbus, etc.
  • Buses, budget airlines, hitchhiking.
  • Car relocation: drivenow.com, hittheroad.ca, autodriveaway

6. Saving Money on Activities

  • Get tourism cards. They will save you money if you want to do sightseeing.
  • Go to museums on free days.
  • Use discount cards: VIP Backpackers (Aus, NZ, Fiji), ISIC, IYTC, YHA, STA Travel
  • Visit local tourist offices.
  • Go on free walking tours.
  • Book via student websites like STA Travel.
  • For deals on activities in NZ: bookme.co.nz

IV. Finding Work & Living Overseas

  1. It’s about getting a job, not a career. It’s about earning money to continue traveling, not building a resume.
  2. Be flexible.

Search online job boards.

  • Council on International Educational Exchange Work Abroad Program
  • Alliances Abroad
  • BUNAC
  • InterExchange.
  •  HelpX.net
  •  Workaway.info

4. Contact expat groups before you leave.
5. Bring copies of your resume and professional certificates.
6. Get business cards!
7. Go to networking events.
8. Common jobs: English teacher, hostel worker, bartender, waiter, cruise ship crew, dive instructor, tour guide.

9. How to Teach English Overseas

a. To get a good-paying job, get a TEFL/CELTA degree.
b. Where to teach: public schools, private schools, language institutes, summer schools, business classes, international schools, private tutoring
c. Popular places: South Korea, Japan, the Middle East, Thailand, China, Mexico, Central Asia, Prague, Argentina, Ukraine
d. Look at DavesESLCafe website for salary expectations.

10. Guest Chat about Working Overseas

a. Teach in Thailand: ajarn.com
b. Be flexible, know a little about the culture, have no expectations.
c. Be patient, and take things slow.

You can live and work in Thailand on a tourist visa, just need to hop in and out of country.

Be wary of any company that asks you to pay a fee to get a job.

DavesESLcafe.com has a good forum for teaching English abroad.

For odd jobs and tasks: taskrabbit.com and elance.com

V. How to Plan Your Dream Trip, Step-by-Step

Decide where you’re going. Be specific.

Decide how long you are going to stay. Be specific.

Research your costs. Estimate total, then round up.

Find the right amount of money for your trip.

  • Do research.
  • Create a budget based on your priorities.
  • Add a cushion. (Add an extra 25% of your total budget.)
  • Think about how much you spend at home.
  • Start saving money.
  • Get a travel credit card.
  • Check for last-minute deals.
  • Book your flight.
  • Book your accommodation.
  • Plan your activities.
  • Sell your stuff.
  •  Automate your bills.
  •  Tell your credit card companies and banks that you’re leaving.
  •  Pack light.
  •  Just go!

Travel doesn’t need to be somewhere really far away, just somewhere different from your daily life. Try weekend trips! Explore your own city!

There is always time to travel.

There is no perfect time to travel. JUST GO.

Tomorrow, there will still be bills to pay. Tomorrow, there still won’t be enough money. Tomorrow, there will still be a wedding or a birthday party to miss. Tomorrow, there will still

be planning to do.

Stop making excuses. Start traveling.

The secret to traveling more is simply the desire to travel more.

Figure out your priorities. Figure out what you want to do. Then do it.

“To my mind, the greatest reward and luxury of travel is to be able to experience everyday things as if for the first time, to be in a position in which almost nothing is so familiar it is taken for granted.” –Bill Bryson

EXTRAS

  • The rebroadcast will be at 4:15pm, 9:50pm, 3:35am, 9:15am pst.
  • Chat room user said: “Best VPN for the price is Private Internet Access. 1 year for only $39.99 USD.”
  • DD recommends: “Hotspot Shield and TunnelBear if you want something to try for free, and Witopia for paid access (which is what I use)”
  • Websites like Airbnb for food: cookening.com and feastly.com
  • Websites for learning languages: busuu.com and duolingo.com and memrise
  • Website for freelance tech jobs: guru.com
  • Website for photo-video jobs: personal-view.com
  • Shannon’s tips for working abroad: http://alittleadrift.com/how-to-work-and-travel-rtw/
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The Nine Qualities of Highly Successful Families

Strong, Healthy Families

From the early 1900’s, family studies focused mostly on the weaknesses within families.

Beginning in the 1960s, however, a few outlier scholars started trying to identify the traits healthy families have in common. Herbert Otto, of the University of Utah, made one of the first lists. It included: shared religious and moral values; consideration; common interests; love and happiness of children; working and playing together.

By 1989, there were enough of these lists that the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services invited a dozen researchers to a conference in Washington, DC, and asked them to find common ground on this issue. As the organizers stated on the eve of the conference,

“Researchers, policy makers, and the media have focused considerable attention on how some families are failing. Much less attention has been paid to strong, healthy families, and the characteristics that make them successful.”

Each scientist in attendance had already published a list of the qualities successful families share. For the first time, though, organizers closely reviewed two dozen of these lists to see if they could establish consensus. According to them, it was remarkably easy. The master list contained nine items.

The Nine Qualities of Successful Families

Download | PDF

1. Communication

Family members talk to one another often, in a manner that’s honest, clear, and open, even when they disagree.

2. Encouragement of individuals

Strong families appreciate each member’s uniqueness while cultivating a sense of belonging to the whole.

3. Commitment to the family

Members of successful families make it clear to one another,and to the world, that their allegiance to their family is strong.

4. Religious/ spiritual well-being

Researchers concluded that a shared value system and moral code were common among highly functioning families. But they said these values were not contingent on membership in any denomination or frequent attendance at worship services.

5. Social connectedness

Successful families are not isolated; they are connected to the wider society, and they reach out to friends and neighbors in crisis.

6. Adaptability

Strong families are structured yet flexible, and they adjust their structure in response to stress.

7. Appreciativeness

People in strong families care deeply for one another, and they express their feelings often. Even if some members are not naturally expressive, they communicate their emotions by doing meaningful things for others.

8. Clear roles

Members of successful families are aware of their responsibilities to the group.

9. Time together

Members of strong families spend time together doing things they enjoy.

The conference results were pubslished in a study by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services called: Identifying Successful Families: An Overview of Constructs and Selected Measure

While nothing specific came out of the project, it did coincide with (and perhaps help legitimize) a much more popular effort in this space, written by Stephen Covey:

The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Families

 

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Developing Our RTW Family Travel Creed – Rules of The Open Road

Family RTW Mission Statement

Just as organizations and businesses need a mission statement, families also need rules to live by.

This is even more important on the road.

Kids and adults need structure, something to remind us what our goals are as a family.

It’s true that “when the going gets tough the tough get going”, but we don’t want the tough to decide its time to get going home.

This is our first draft, months before our trip.

We sat down at dinner tonight and came up with these, they will probably change over time.

1. Pasquini Positive Perspective: (The 3 P’s)

This is a willingness to always look at the positive in a seemly negative situation at all times. Yes, we can complain and be upset about something, but we will always strive to get over it by practicing and searching for at least one positive view-point or outcome to the situation. (Stephen wanted to just say “No Complaining”. But who are we kidding? You can only fight against human nature; not ignore it completely especially with children. It is their God-given right to complain and find every little thing in the world that is unfair.)

2. We are a Team and are each others allies:

This is the mindset that we can do anything if we have each other and work together. We’ll have each others back and protect each other.

3. We will have empathy and compassion for others:

We will search to understand other cultures in a loving way and show kindness to each other.

4. If you make a mistake your Brain Grows:

This is my daughter’s favorite and is a new way of saying we learn from our mistakes. We will not be afraid of doing something wrong and we won’t shy away from something in fear of failure.

5. Let it go:

We will accept that some things are just the way things are and we have to let it go so we don’t carry around guilt, anger, resentment, or sadness. Forgiveness is a powerful tool and accepts the things we can’t change.

6. Cultural awareness:

We will enter countries and cultures armed with at least 10 words in their language (still figuring out which words)

  1. Hello
  2. Thank you
  3. My name is
  4. Sorry.

We will always be courteous and aware that we are visitors in their country and our norms may be different than theirs. This does not make it wrong or right as that is up to the society and culture to own for themselves. We will strive to understand and appreciate all differences.

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The Start – Around The World Family Travel From Dream to Reality

The Immaculate Conception

It’s been over a year now since Stephen and I had a heart to heart about traveling around the world.

I cautiously agreed to it and in the last few weeks I’m wondering, “What was I thinking!”

He’s called me on it and now we’re in a frenzy of planning, dreaming and getting my head wrapped around it all.

At first I was upset.

I was happy with my life as is.

I was finally getting what a Mom was and setting down into the routine of school, friends, activities and finally accepting my identity as Mom. Really Now?

He wants to disrupt it and call me on that promise?

But, I have to trust this is why I fell in love with him over 15 years ago.

He pushes me in ways I would have never pushed myself and I’m a better person for it. Life is never boring!

I know ultimately if he’s not happy, how could I be happy? He needs this now in his life and as a family we will benefit from his dream.

I’m honored we’ll get to do this together as a family.

Making The Commitment

It’s been since Christmas since we’ve really committed and I’ve let go of many things.

I’m excited to let go of more. I’m slowly letting my fears of “what if’s” turn into “what possibilities” are there?

Letting go and dealing with loss is a process though and one not to just poo poo.

Morning the loss of a great school for both my children and the possibility of not being able to get back in; is huge!

I’m trusting and taking a leap of faith that this next year will off set these losses and new possibilities will emerge.

  • I look around the house and can’t wait to empty and throw away the dreaded “junk draw”.
  • I look at the kids’ toys and can’t wait to sell or give away those blocks, paints, puzzles, craft box that just might come out on a rainy day. (As it so happens we’re in a long drought).
  • I look at the Tupperware draw and can’t wait to throw it all way and condense my life into a back pack.

But what does that mean with two small kids?

Do they get a backpacks too?

So many questions that we’ll only have to find out for ourselves and hopefully share with others along the way.

 A Child’s Perspective

I’ve watched my kids go through this with us.

Just this morning the fears and excitements crossed their faces in a matter of seconds.

Working together through their questions and grasping an answer was swift. It’s fun to see what their losses are and excitements of the future are. What about Cookie our cat? They were watching a travel show on Istanbul Turkey.

The hustle and bustle of the market made them both excited and scared all at ounce.

“What do we do if we get lost?!” my 6 yr old daughter screamed.

Wow, I never thought about that and what a great question to have a plan in place for.

What would we do? We quickly brain stormed some ideas and it was decided we’ll get bracelets with names/numbers on them and Lucca (my almost 4 yr old) said, “We could have a whistle and a travel hat!”. Ok, I’m down with the whistle but we’ll have to think about the “hat”.

The morning unraveled into a sibling fight, and then time out for Lucca.

Does this seem familiar?

Just when you’re having an amazing family moment one of your kids melts down. After the tantrum, time out and apologies given and accepted, we quickly continued our travel question/answer session over waffles.

We launched into a great discussion on the norms we wanted as a family while on the trip. First what is a norm?

Dad joined in and we could hardly contain ourselves. Exciting ideas flew back and forth on travel, blogs, web sites, rules to live by, where we wanted to go and things we wanted to do.

This is just the start of many family meetings and more exciting things come.